I think many people, family and colleagues, have been surprised
by my willingness to interview and potentially move from Texas
to places like California or New York.
Don't you want to stay in Texas? I hear them say.
I don't really know how to answer that question. It seems like right now in my
life, what I
want geographically just does not matter. Sure, I would like
to stay in Texas..
but even staying in Texas
does not guarantee I will stay by family or good friends.
In fact, as much as I don’t mind being in Lubbock, my
closest friends here have been my co-workers, who have been deep friends with
me in my ministry last year and this year. I have found friendships at church
as well, but unlike in Houston, Marshall,
or Abilene, so
far no best friends have surfaced. And the amazing thing is I survived my move
here from Abilene to Lubbock... and I have grown so much. I am
farther from friends and family than I have ever been. It was
hard. But I have grown leaps and bounds, for the better.
Actually, for a while I did plan on just staying in Texas, and who knows, I
might still. Until I get a job, not just interviews, it is really all up in the
air. But yes, at first thinking of moving so far was difficult for me, but the
thought of staying and taking some job that did not fulfill me really worried
me. Before I came to Lubbock
I worked two jobs, about 55-60 hours per week and made basically nothing. I was wearing
myself out to survive and was barely able to pay bills. If I can avoid that, I
will do it at all costs.
I would also really like to pay off as many of my student
loans in the next 5-10 years as possible. I am fine living simplistic. I really
enjoy renting and being single helps. I have no problem with living the way I have so I
may actually be able to pay off all my student loan debt (with a better paying
and professional ministry job) in those 5-10 years.
However, not all of this is financial; some of it is intellectual
and spiritual. Intellectually, when I was working retail, I knew everyday I was
not using my gifts and talents. I did learn how the other side lives and it did
afford me the opportunity to meet different people who were not in my
"Christian Bubble"; however, I longed so deeply to do ministry. I
long for that now. I long for it more than staying in Texas.
Lastly, I think of Abraham, who moved to a
foreign land, far away from what he knew. It was what was needed at the time. Moving far away may
be what I need. People ask me: How will you know it is God's will? I think of
God's will as generally open and sometimes specific, which means as a Christian
I am compassionate towards others, as an religious professional I seek out all open
and potential doors to serve, and as a person, that God wants good things for me,
but I must also do some work. And yet, somehow, after I have moved or gone
through a time of trial, in hindsight, I am often able to see God's plan unfolding,
but I do not think God articulates and plans every second of our life
beforehand. I think God is with us, guiding us, rejoicing and mourning with us through
our times of triumph and struggle.
So, I suppose I have surprised some of my family and friends
by being open to moving so far away... and the truth is I surprise myself too.
A few years ago I would have been too stuck in fear to move so far, but moving
to Lubbock and learning more about myself, I know that no matter where I am that God is
with me and I will always be connected with my dear friends and family. God
bless you all and prayers are appreciated. It brings me much peace facing such
a change to be washed in the prayers of the saints, the prayers of my dear family and friends.
~ Daniel Brockhan
