Forgetting

Have you ever found yourself forgotten by a friend? Have you ever found yourself forgetting a friend? It sometimes happens slowly, other times very quickly, that person who was your friend becomes too busy, perhaps it is work or other friends, maybe they have a wife or kids; whatever the reason, you find that in some way you feel as if you have been forgotten, denied. In some manner, it is as if you have been ripped from that person, so that the connection you once possessed is now severed and can only be mended if the friendship becomes reciprocal again. However, until that time though there is an emptiness that fills your life, it can no longer be what it once was, for even if the friendship is later rekindled, there is now a disconnect, a distortion between the two of you.

What if Jonathan had forgotten about David? What if Boaz had forgotten about Ruth? What if Moses had forgotten Israel and not pleaded with God? What if God had forgotten about his people after the exile and never brought about Jesus and the New Covenant?

I was thinking this morning about people saying the greatest sin is pride, I have believed it for a long time... but I have begun to wonder if forgetfulness and its cousin “Apathy” may not be worse. If one is prideful then they have an arrogance about them, they are fighting against or for something; however, if one is apathetic about their friendship, if one forgets about their loved ones, isn’t that more horrendous than pride. I wonder if in our faith it is far worse to be apathetic and forget God than it is to be prideful…

Are there friendships you have forgotten? Are there relationships in which you yourself have been forgotten? Have you forgotten God, somehow left your Christian walk or your search for truth? Have you become apathetic because you were hurt, because there was suffering? Have you forgotten God because sin seemed easy and more desirable, leaving you wondering now where God is? Are you feeling alone in this world, forgotten by all your friends? If you have, know that God knows your pain; millions and billions forget God every day, every second.... God reached out his hand through creation and later through Christ Jesus, yet still with all his attempts at friendship with us, those attempts at a personal relationship are turned down and rejected constantly.

The greatest sin is forgetfulness, it is what apathy is made of and perhaps why scripture tells us to renew our minds (Romans 12:1-2)... but I also think it is maybe the definition of hell everyone is looking for... see for those who choose to forget God with their lives, who rebel against God and everything he represents, in the end it is God who forgets them, whether it be by them being consumed in the river of fire and judgment or if it is by simply taking his breathe/spirit of life outside of that person and than that breath evaporating into the oceans and sky’s of eternity. But the truth is that God does not want to be forgotten, neither does he want to forget his creation.



Have you ever taken the Lords Supper (MK 14:12-26; MT 28:17-30)? If you have then maybe you have seen or heard these words: Remember Me. Maybe those words are truer than we think to faith and our lives, maybe we should hear them more often and remember them....

"When the hour came, Jesus and his apostles reclined at the table. And he said to them, "I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer. For I tell you, I will not eat it again until it finds fulfillment in the kingdom of God." After taking the cup, he gave thanks and said, "Take this and divide it among you. For I tell you I will not drink again of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes." And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, "This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me." - Luke 22:14-19

Who have you forgotten?


~ Daniel

Pic:
http://qmf.org.au/files/images/Remember%20Me_Media.jpg

Dreams and Fears

I have been thinking about dreams and fears a lot lately and about my devotion to Christ. I think that next Sunday when I preach filling in for a friend I am going to preach on fear, something related to Moses and some others we see in scripture. No one was without fear, from Moses to David, Elijah running to the cave, Jeremiah wrestling with his calling, and Jesus in the garden pleading with God to take the cup from him if there was any other possible way.

I have fear, I will admit it... I know a lot of people do not; they feel it better to hide fear from others and even from themselves. Sometimes I am fearful of things like driving and driving through the rain.... but other times I am afraid of so much more. Sometimes I am afraid that I have spent all this time educating myself for a full-time ministry position, following God, and now in the time when things should happen nothing is.. and my fear is that nothing will ever come of it, that I will never find a ministry job, that somehow I am missing something or others will never see the spark of God in me, the one that I know is there but need a chance to show, need a chance to cultivate and mold and express to others.

I have another fear... It is being up in the front, though not nearly as bad as it use to be it is still there, only by the times I have pushed myself forward (with some help from others and strength from God) have I found it easier as my life as progressed. Of course, I have also learned that I am much more nervous before being up front than when I am actually up front, kinda like getting a shot at the doctors office... sometimes the waiting is so very unnerving and difficult, perhaps that is why I find this period in my life quite unnerving. Trying to trust God and wait when the signs seem to show otherwise is difficult. But my fear is that I give up on my calling because it makes me uncomfortable, because it takes risks, because I may not seem the minister-type to some. I have friends who have given up their callings (ministry or otherwise), I know who they are and it saddens me to see them settle for something less when God called them to something greater. Some would say they found a more practical route, more financially feasible, got married or had kids.... to me these are excuses in life that hinder us from following God, from becoming fulfilled.

My fear is that I will never get up and preach like I dream about, preaching sermons that bring light into peoples life. Some that bring them kneeling with utter conviction and others that will infuse believers with joy in the love and compassion from their God, and that that love might be shared with others as the community bond tightens and the Kingdom of God grows like a mustard seed. I fear I will become lazy and doubtful and leave these dreams, these visions behind and trade them for something plain, something normal, settle for a mediocre faith, one that is based on my level of ease and not based on struggling to risk, struggling to let God use me in ways I cannot even imagine.

Another underlying fear is that I will be single, that I will never be married. As much as single guys normally are not supposed to want such things, I actually do... and I have this fear that it will never happen either because it is not God's will for my life or because I have become so pessimistic about relationships now that I will never try for more than friendship, nor would anyone ever see me as more... that I would remain stuck between the family I grew up with and the family I will never have.

Fears, yes I have fears but mixed in with these fears are my dreams, did you sense them in those paragraphs I just wrote, strewn without and within, between the lines and intermixed with my fears... yes, they are intertwined and if I never meet my fears, if I never trust God in those times and in those things, then I will never truly be able to even try grasping at such dreams.

My dreams are to have a wife and a family one day, but also to be a Christian who truly expresses Christ with both my words and my deeds; spoken, written, and acted-out in and through my life. That I will find a ministry job that will use all my gifts and that God will give me the boldness to speak those words, the ones that sit between his word and spirit and my mouth, the ones that stay hidden, the ones that lay waiting... waiting for what sometimes I am not sure...

So my dear fellow readers,
I now ask you the questions...

What are you fears?
What are you dreams?
Have you given up? Are you struggling?
How do your fears and dreams mix and fight against one another?

~ Daniel

Pic:
http://imgarchive.info/200904/47279.jpg

Friends, Hugs, and Goodbyes

I don’t now why I feel compelled to write this, especially at 5:30 in the morning. Maybe it is because I get up so early for one of my jobs; maybe it is because other times you just feel compelled to write sometimes. Anyways, yesterday night I had dinner with some good friends, one of whom is leaving and it made me think about friendships, hugs, and goodbyes - so I felt like writing and making that my title, so here we go...

I ate with some friends last night at a place in town called Dos Amigos. The place was pretty good, though to me sometimes Mexican restaurants always seem the same pretty much. Sure the salsa, chips, and atmosphere might be a little different but it always feels like they are all the same. Well, we went out to eat to kinda hang out and say goodbye to a good friend who is leaving town. Later when this friend was dropping me and another friend off we both hugged goodbye.

This got me thinking... sure my friend will visit but things wont be the same, because friendships never really are once you leave... and you are ever-so lucky if a friendship survives after someone moves away. Sure we have all our different technologies - our Facebook, our texting (for some), and our cell phones; however, it is never the same as being with someone in-person, as a group or individually.

Sometimes it is little times like hugging a friend to say goodbye that remind me of all the other times I have had to say goodbye to others and how much I always miss those friendships, each of those people were unique to me. I mean, I had other guy friends as a child and remember them but when those friends moved off I just kinda felt bad but didn’t think about it all that much (maybe cause I am a guy or something). However, since college I hate saying goodbye, and its not like I get all emotional and start crying, not that there would be anything wrong with that (insert reference of Seinfeld, lol) - its just not really my style I suppose... but inside it always hurts to say goodbye and think of all the good times you had with those friends and how you will miss not being able to see them as much.

This also reminds me of my good guy friends from home: Jacob and Thomas, whom I still chat with on Facebook and on my cell from time to time, yet dearly miss that connection we all had as brothers in Christ and as best friends for a time. It makes me miss my best friends from college Grant, Willie, then Jonathon, Fili and Mark… Though I am very thankful for God blessing me with my very close friendship currently with Nathan and also with his wife Meredith (who are awesome people by the way).

I don’t know, sometimes being single and being in your mid-twenties makes me wish we didn’t have to leave friends, that God would somehow keep us together with our friends; but it seems most of the time we move again and must leave them behind, only left with the memories and occasional meetings once distance is put into the friend equation.

I wish I could live in a house with all my close friends, so that there wouldn’t be so much silence all the time, so many empty sounds. I miss hearing the laughter of other people in my house, of family... and I even think hearing the arguing is worth having that laughter in your life, worth having that close sense of connection. I miss that... and for those who have moved away from home, friends are the nearest and closest thing we have to family.

It might sound odd... but many people think of Heaven as a place of eternal joy, of no pain and suffering... but I also like to think of it as a place where friends don’t have to say goodbye, where distance is no longer a matter between friends, and where hugs are never connected with the down-feeling of saying goodbye but instead are only connected with see-ya-laters.

So this is my blog, these are my thoughts... maybe a little all random, maybe they make complete sense. Maybe these are encouraging or discouraging... I am not really sure myself; however, if there is one thing I have learned it is never to take your friends, to take that friendship for granted and to take hold of such a thing, to hold on to such people while you can before distance is added and time may soon leave them as a mere memory of the distant past.

~ Daniel

A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities.- William Arthur Ward

A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself-and especially to feel, or not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at any moment is fine with them. That's what real love amounts to - letting a person be what he really is.- Jim Morrison

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares. ~Henri Nouwen

Pic:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_3j6hW6C4dPGV_MGyT1PouoMGnqdONSL_Gm1EZosa8Py9ruGwuhKPjQTZZ2w21mgc7yAgp3JiC1TnD6MlUNwsGLI5ZHhwKrIudhXP0SjTBTQsU7qhFDwx_gC4h2T62Jy4uqPTHXcAJLmC/s400/farm+hugs.jpg