Short Blog: True Repentance

Our vices, the evil within and around us, is not merely fought by feeling poorly. Recognizing the need is not repentance, though it is a first step. The second step is that we must live in struggle, invite strife into our life, let the Holy Spirit do its work of conviction in our hearts. Here is where eyes will be opened to truly see how they were oppressed and burdened by sins that went on (or are still going on).

True repentance, like love, is not proven by words but by actions. True repentance, is not a feeling, but an inviting God to produce in us a different motivation, a change, another direction, an action within us; moving us away from our selfish path and putting our feet back on His Kingdom path.

“This, then, is how you should pray: “‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.” - Matthew 6:9-10

True repentance is seeing the burden of sin, of wrongdoing, and making choices to change. Instead of our flesh or Satan chocking our life away through negative thoughts or actions (or in-actions), we choose God, for in our weakness He is our strength. We invite God into our weaknesses, our problems, for evil and sin is only ever overcome by His goodness, only overcome by His guidance and love.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” - Matthew 11:28-30

~ Daniel Brockhan

What Is God's Will And How Can It Be Found?

What is God’s will? That is the question. We are taught in the church God's will is something we can attain, that if we pray enough, struggle enough, talk to others enough it is something we will (easily) figure out. In his book Mere Christianity, CS Lewis speaks about God being outside of time. If the vastness of God were a sheet of paper, time and all of us in it might be just a dot, a speck on that paper.

Think about that.

The truth is, God's will, like life, is much more complicated, instead of being black and white it can seem grey, instead of being linear it is more like a blank page with dots seemingly spread randomly, each representing a choice we could make or a person we could meet to help us in the right direction. At first to us it may just seem like a random mishmash.

In the church we are taught that there is only one story, one line or path that is God's will for us. This means any decision we make incorrectly could be terrible because if it’s not part of the plan, not part of His plan,  what happens to us if mess up, don't follow, or disobey?

The problem is that in the scriptures there are plenty of stories where God works with humanity despite their flaws, so being wrong may not be what God desires for us, but it can help us learn and be able to better know more about ourselves; who we are, and that becomes part of God's plan and story for our life.

Maybe God's will is more about a metamorphosis in us, a transforming, and all the changes in us that take place as we seek to become more like Christ. So then, first we must ask if such choices or decisions are full of selfishness and pride. Are we putting what we want first or are we putting God first? Is Christ first in our life? This should be the first and most important question.

This means if we have two great job opportunities that are a good fit, we do not have to worry about choosing the wrong job. One could pick the one that will help provide better for their family, maybe it pays a little more or is closer to relatives. Maybe it might help one pay off student or credit card debt. So long as we are following God first, such decisions between two good options need not weigh us down; instead we have freedom in Christ for good things.

This brings me to the second aspect of God's will, which is being confused or uncomfortable. Does this make you uncomfortable? Yes, as odd as it sounds, sometimes I feel that being in God's will is something that tends to make us feel uncomfortable. Indeed, if God's will is about transforming us, this means we will be stretched and challenged. Are you being challenged? How else are we to grow and learn?

People ask me what it is like moving from family and friends states away to come and work as a Chaplain. I tell them I enjoy my job but miss everyone. There is a lot of truth and emotion in that one simple statement. Sure I keep up with them; however, the difficulty comes in not being able to connect with them in-person. The truth is that sometimes we must make sacrifices and choices... or make sacrifices with our choices. My choice was to follow God and trust him to provide or to stay in Texas with family and friends but be miserable professionally, likely working a minimum wage job somewhere, barely getting by and not using my abilities.

God wanted more for me than barely getting by; He wanted me to thrive.

He wants you to thrive as well!

However, I had to take the step of applying to positions outside of Texas. Then, as I began to get interviews (being uncomfortable yet excited about that fact), doors began to open. I remember after getting those first e-mails from other states, I finally said, "Ok God, well if I'm offered a position and I take it, You are going to have to provide… a lot, especially a good church and friends."

I did find a wonderful church and am still in the process of making friends. Yes, it is difficult… and that is part of growing, of being with God in that difficulty. God doesn't just want your prayer requests for peace, wisdom, and answers to a choice, decision, or situation; He wants you to grieve and struggle with Him just as much as you thank Him endlessly in times of joy and celebration. This is how He works in and through us each and every day, back and forth, the Potter to the clay.

So, What is Gods Will?
(1) He wishes for you to follow and put Christ first.
(2) He wishes to make you uncomfortable so you will grow.
(3) His will is normally seen more in hindsight than in the present.
(4) Thus, His will is something we must go through… then it is made known.

What do you think of God's will?
How do you seek it, perceive it, know it, experience it?

~ Daniel Brockhan

Next Blog:
I Don't Believe in "The One":
How a Professors Words Changed my Thoughts on Dating & Marriage

Do You Love Me More Than These?

A Closer Look at John 21

Despite the popularity of the Gospel of John, most overlook the way it ends. However, the end is a very important part of how the church began and how God comes to restore each of us after we stumble and fall.

See, after Jesus predicted Peter would deny him, which Peter reacted to in disbelief, Peter did end up denying Christ just as he had told him. After the Crucifixion though, along with the other disciples, Peter left and went back to his old ways.

Peter went back to fishing, going out in his boat and casting his nets... no longer was he a fisher of men. This fact is often overlooked. Peter, though had claimed Jesus as the Christ, still fell, he denied, he abandoned his faith, he then left and went to follow who he was before. Oh, how often do we do the same.

So, Jesus comes up to Peter, with his nets full of fish, full of his old life and ask: "Peter, do you love me more than these?" Do you love me more than these fish? Do you love me more than your old life? Your own ways? Your habits or desires? Your deep dark thoughts or doubts? Your addictions to self? Your thinking only of yourself? Do you, Peter, love me more than these?

Peter replies twice in the Greek that he loves Jesus unconditionally (Agape); yet Jesus repeats the question a third time, asking Peter if he even loves him as a friend (Phileo), are they even close at all? Peter replied a third time to which Jesus replied, "Go feed my sheep."

See, not only do we see a parallel here between the three times Peter denied Christ and the three times he is asked this question - but this means something amazing for us as well:

When we are uncertain and run from God, God will restore us if we still claim to know Him, and most importantly if we lay down our life, our fish, our ways or things or issues or people we love more than God and take up His name, His Kingdom, feeding his lambs, making our life about following Christ and serving others, not self; feeding His sheep and not our own stomachs.

So, Jesus comes to you today at your school, campus, home, or work and asks:
Do you love me more than these? You know what he means, and He means you to sacrifice it, whatever it may be, for this is what blocks you from growing, from becoming more like Christ; being able to know, follow, and obey.

Do you love me more than these?
Only you know the answer....

~ Daniel Brockhan

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The Truth About: The Flesh vs. The Spirit 3/3

Click Here for The Truth About: The Flesh vs. The Spirit 1/3

Click Here for The Truth About: The Flesh vs. The Spirit 2/3 

I am so very sorry Lord when I fail you, when my feelings, my flesh, the distractions of the world take your place, when other things are given priority. When I am confused, lost, and instead of turning to you, I sometimes push your sweet still-small voice away.

I cry and weep for that which I do not have... but do I weep for the lost, the sick, the weak, the needy, for others in the same way? Damn my selfish heart, my lonely heart, for it cries out to be loved, more than to love, it grieves what I do not have instead of being thankful for that which I possess.

I struggle between being content (where I can be lazy) and taking initiative (where I can push myself too hard). Help me to find balance. Help me to be wise in how I spend my time, with whom I spend my time, and where my thoughts go throughout the day. May I invest in activities and people that enrich my life and may my thoughts ever-be turning back toward You.

Help me in those times when my flesh seems to overtake my spirit, when I am weak, please make me strong by the life, teachings, death, and resurrection of Jesus the Christ. Help me by the counsel, guidance, and wisdom of your Holy Spirit. Help me God the Father as Parent, as one who cares deeply for me and loves me unconditionally despite my failures and all the times I lose focus and turn away. May I always be reminded of Your goodness, Your love, and Your eternal kindness.

A-men

         ~ Daniel Brockhan

The Truth About: The Flesh vs. The Spirit 2/3

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. - Galatians 5:16-17

We satisfy self. We are empty, so we fill ourselves with food. We feel ugly or fat so we starve ourselves. We want love so we seek out quick fixes and relationships by getting involved with those who lack character, reading fanciful romance novels, or devouring unrealistic movies, including being drawn in by porn. We do not know how to deal with our life, our thoughts, or our emotions, so we pick up bottles of booze, of medications, or drugs and try to lose ourselves. Indeed, we are lost.

We feel like others do not understand, so we hide in our shells, lock ourselves up so that no one can see inside. We sit alone so we remain hidden or we slip on a fake smile. Perhaps we take part in endless activities, doing anything and everything to stay busy, because if we sat still, if we had to be quiet, even for a moment, our demons, our struggles come out to meet us. BUT!

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. - Galatians 5:22-25

Instead of bringing these issues to God, sitting at His feet, we let our thoughts; our minds become bombarded by this world. Instead of feeding our Spirit, we feed the Flesh. Instead of being real at church, with our brothers or sisters in Christ, we hide. Only, what we do not know is that the longer we hide, the longer Satan has to get into our lives, the more our fleshly groans louder, the more we can miss Gods still-small voice in our lives.

This week, feed your Spirit not your Flesh. This week, go out when you would sit.. or sit when you would go out. This week, be open with a brother or sister in Christ that you trust. Stop hiding. Let them know what is going on in you, where you have been struggling, then ask for prayer. Finally, ask others what they are going through and seek out ways to pray and care for them as well.

May we start challenging ourselves to be more open and authentic, to make and create safe places where we can share life and faith, the good and bad. May we mourn with those who mourn and rejoice with those who rejoice. And in all things, May Christ be Praised.

~ Daniel Brockhan

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The Truth About: The Flesh vs. The Spirit 1/3

We live in a time, in a church that seeks and years for openness; yet it does not seem ready for the deep truths and sadness and struggles in the lives of its members. While the church is diving deeper into helping those who have been divorced, face death, grief, loss, depression, weight issues, drug, and alcohol issues; is the church ready for openness regarding other deep issues? Is the church ready to discuss body image/self-esteem issues, eating disorders, abuse, anger, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, adultery, lust, premarital sex, masturbation, or pornography (to name a few)?

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
- Galatians 5:19-21

Our members wants frankness but aren't quite sure if the church is a safe place. Will people gossip about us? Will they put out prayer requests on issues we might not want public? Will they think ill of us for admitting fault? The truth is we are all dirty, that none are perfect, and that Christ died for all our sins. We have mental images of others being perfect Christians, but this is simply not true, a lie to deceive us. I believe we all are simply too scared to let down our defenses, too fearful to be honest and vulnerable, too hurt to weep with others or for ourselves while on the outside we feel the ongoing need to express ongoing contentment, happiness, joy, and smiles to those watching.

So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! - Romans 7: 21-25a

Can and will we be able to share our struggles, trials, and confusions about life? Paul tells us we have two competing desires, while one part of us bows before God in our spirit, another part of us bows before self, forsaking God and others, even sacrificing our future when we are swayed by our temporal fleshly desires.

~ Daniel Brockhan

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Richard J. Foster On Prayer (Part 3 of 3)

Excerpts from:

Prayer: The Heart's True Home

All creation seems in harmony with you, the Master Conductor. All, that is, except me. Why? Why do I alone want to sing my own melody? I certainly am a stubborn creature. Forgive me. I do desire to come into harmony with you more fully and more often. I do desire a fellowship that is consistent and sustaining. Please nurture this desire of mine, which seems so small and tentative right now…. For Jesus sake. – Amen. [Pg. 129, Chapter: Unceasing Prayer]

We live in a wordy world with our sophisticated high-tech telecommunication systems. We now have the dubious distinction of being able to communicate more and say less than any civilization in history. [Pg. 155, Chapter:  Contemplative Prayer]

The discovery of God lies in the daily and the ordinary, not in the spectacular and the heroic. If we cannot find God in the routines of home and shop, then we will not find him at all. Ours is to be a symphonic piety in which all the activities of work and play and family and worship and sex and sleep are the holy habits of the eternal. [Pg. 171, Chapter: Praying the Ordinary]

This wrestling is a hard image for us to accept. We much prefer the image of restful harmony. Our difficulty is due, in part, to our cultures inability to reconcile struggle with love. We assume a loving relationship by its very nature must be peaceful and harmonious, and yet even on a human level those things we care about the most deeply we argue for the most passionately. Struggle is consistent with love, for it is an expression of our caring. [Pg. 225, Chapter: The Prayer of Suffering]

In the strong name of Christ I stand against the world, the flesh, and the devil. I resist every force that would seek to distract me from my center in God. I reject the distorted concepts and ideas that make sin plausible and desirable. I oppose every attempt to keep me from knowing full fellowship with God…. Find your satisfaction in the infinite love of God’s love rather than the bland diet of sin. I call upon the good, the true, and the beautiful to rise up within me and the evil to subside…. By the authority of almighty God I tear down Satan’s strongholds in my life, in the lives of those I love, and in the society in which I live. [Pg. 242, Chapter: Authoritative Prayer]

~ Daniel Brockhan

Richard J. Foster On Prayer (Part 2 of 3)

Excerpts from:

Prayer: The Heart's True Home

In solitude, however, we die not only to others but also to ourselves…. Slowly, we find ourselves letting go of our inner compulsions to acquire more wealth than we need, look more youthful than we are, attain more status than is wise. In the stillness, our false, busy selves are unmasked and seen for the imposters they truly are. [Pg. 63, Chapter: Formation Prayer]

We must be careful here not to lay impossible burdens upon people…. Over this matter I want to give some counsel for parents of infants. The demand that your baby makes are immense – more than you realize right now – especially if you are a single parent. The interruptions never end…. Rather than trying to pray in some fanciful isolation that you will never find, discover God in your times with your baby. God will become real to you through your baby. The times of play with your baby are your prayers. You may be able to pray during feeding time – this is especially true for nursing mothers – so sing your prayer to the Lord. In a few short months you will be able to return to a more regular pattern of prayer. [Pg. 73-4, Chapter: Covenant Prayer]

The Holy Spirit of God, the third member of the Trinity himself accompanies us in our prayers. When we stumble over our words, the Spirit straightens out the syntax. When we pray with muddy motives, the Spirit purifies the stream. When we see through a glass darkly, the Spirit adjusts and focuses what we are asking until it corresponds to the will of God. The point is that we do not have to have everything perfect when we pray. The Spirit reshapes, refines, and reinterprets our feeble, ego-driven prayers. [Pg. 98-9, Chapter: The Prayer of Rest]

We need not be forced to choose one over the other.... We can be lifted into high, holy reverence by the richness and depth of a well-crafted liturgy. We can also be drawn into breath-taking wonder through the warmth and intimacy of spontaneous worship. Ours is a spirituality that can embrace both. [Pg. 105, Chapter: Sacramental Prayer]

I am sure you sense the desperate need for Unceasing Prayer in our day. We pant through endless series of activities with scattered minds and noisy hearts. We feel strained, hurried, breathless. Thoughts dart in and out of our minds with no rhyme or reason. Seldom can we focus on a single thing for long. Everything and anything interrupt our sense of concentration. We are distracted people. Unceasing prayer has a way of speaking peace to the chaos. [Pg. 121, Chapter: Unceasing Prayer]

~ Daniel Brockhan

Richard J. Foster On Prayer (Part 1 of 3)

Excerpts from:
Prayer: The Heart's True Home

Paul, you may remember, urges us to offer our bodies - our very selves – as living sacrifices to God (Rom. 12:1)…. The Offering of ourselves can only be the offering of our lives experience, because this alone is who we are. And who we are – not who we want to be – is the only offering we have to give. We give God therefore not just our strengths but also our weaknesses, not just our giftedness but also our brokenness. Our duplicity, our lust, our narcissism, our sloth – all are laid on the altar of sacrifice. [Pg. 31, Chapter: Prayer of Examen]

We must not deny or ignore the depth of our evil, for, paradoxically, our sinfulness becomes our bread. When in honesty we accept the evil that is in us as part of the truth about ourselves and offer that truth up to God, we are in a mysterious way nourished. Even the truth about our shadow side sets us free (John 8:32). [Pg. 31, Chapter: Prayer of Examen]

As we are learning to pray we discover as interesting progression. In the beginning our will is in struggle with God’s will. We beg. We pout. We demand. We expect God to perform like a magician or shower us with blessings like Father Christmas. We major in instant solutions and manipulative prayers. [Pg. 47, Chapter: Prayer of Relinquishment]

As difficult as this time of struggle is, we must never despise it or try to avoid it. It is an essential part of our growing and deepening in things spiritual. To be sure, it is an inferior stage, but only in the sense that a child is at an inferior stage to that of an adult. The adult can reason better and carry heavier loads because both brain and brawn are more fully developed, but the child is doing exactly what we would expect at that age. So, it is in the life of the spirit. [Pg. 47, Chapter: Prayer of Relinquishment]

O Lord, how do I let go when I’m so unsure of things? I’m unsure of your will, and I’m unsure of myself… That really isn't the problem at all, is it? The truth of the matter is that I hate the very idea of letting go. I really want to be in control. No, I need to be in control. That’s it, isn't it? I’m afraid to give up control, afraid of what might happen. Heal my fear, Lord.[Pg. 56, Chapter: Prayer of Relinquishment]

The reason for this is simple to see: by means of solitude God frees us from our bondage to people and our own inner compulsions. To enter into solitude, we must disregard what other think of us. Who will understand this call to aloneness? Even our closest friends will see it as a waste of precious time and rather self-centered. But, oh, the liberty that is released in our hearts when we let go of the opinions of others! [Pg. 63, Chapter: Formation Prayer]

~ Daniel Brockhan

Our First Affection: Part 2 of 2

Fasting

About a month ago I finished reading through John Piper's book on Fasting called "A Hunger for God". I had read the book a few years ago when I was merely curious about the practice. At the time I was in a supervision in ministry class and my pastor, who was my mentor, asked if I had ever fasted and would I fast while going through this book? I replied in the past I had fasted from television, video games, and the internet but only rarely ever had fasted from food. I then told him I was merely curious to read a book that went deeper into the spiritual discipline. The truth was, I wasn’t ready at all to seriously seek out to do such a thing. I mean, I like food and I don’t like feeling hungry. That should have told me something but at the time I was too hard-headed to hear God in the midst of all the other things I had going on at the time.

While reading this book again recently my church asked the congregation to fast if the spirit led them, as we had our pastor move back to Texas and our church is seeking God's will on where to go next. For some reason this time I thought I might begin trying to do this thing called fasting, after all, not only is my church seeking direction, but I am still trying to adjust to a huge transition in my life, continue to seek out and make friends, as well as ponder with God if there may or may not ever be a spouse and family in my future.

I'd say the first few times I did not last long trying to NOT eat because I did not much like the feeling of being hungry, much like I expected. In fact, sometimes I would decide I was hungry enough and semi-gorge myself on food. Then it started to hit me. What am I truly hungry for? Am I hungry for jobs to pay down student loan debt? Am I hungry for friends? Am I really hungry for food at times? Am I hungry for a relationship? Am I hungry for God? And why does it take me all those other questions to get to pondering my hunger for God?

Fasting is one expression of our struggle. Fasting is the voluntary denial of a normal function for the sake of intense spiritual activity. It is a sign of our seriousness and intensity. When we fast, we are intentionally relinquishing the first right given to the human family in the garden - the right to eat.... Our fasting is part of our wresting with God. It is part of the birth pangs we endure in order to see new life come forth.
- Richard J. Foster, Prayer: Finding The Heart's True Home

And then another proverbial blow to my mind. I even wrote about it in my last blog. It is all about the loss of control. We indulge in these things, these distractions, we find ourselves consumed by materialism and individualism, by technology, by relationships, and these easily become distractions and idols because we simply are fearful, truly and utterly fearful about giving God control, about handing our life, every situation truly and openly up to Him. I think Job says it best, "Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord"(1:21).

This here is they key. We have to find a way to be content in all situations, good or bad, things that makes sense or confuse us, knowing that in some way this, right now, right here in the present is exactly where we are supposed to be. God gives us a choice right here and now to follow Him or follow the world, but either way He desires and will try to nudge us, give us small impressions to follow Him. He will seek to guide us with his gentle small voice, but we can only have eyes to see past our blindness and ears to hear past our deafness if we relinquish control, accept where we are and seek out God, laying down all and every external.

This is not for the faint of heart, but I feel like if we are to take on such a thing, truly desire to seek out God and his ongoing wills for our life, we must see where we are, put ourselves in his ever-loving hands, trust he will mold us and guide us. One way we do this, placing him in this position of control, is by fasting, by practicing sacrificing our desires in seeking Him out.

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. 17 But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, 18 so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. - Matthew 6:16-18

We do not have to fast from food, or food alone, but the discipline is there and it is very clear that when people are seeking God and seeking discernment, for impressions from the spirit that this is a spiritual discipline to be practiced. In fact, Jesus does not say if we practice this but when we practice, so the questions are left to us.

Are we willing to give up control? Are we willing to put ourselves in God's hands?
Are we willing to fast from things that are between us and God?
Are we willing to listen to God's still-small voice and be open to the impression of the Holy Spirit?
Are we willing to move forward with God not knowing the outcome or its timing?
Are we willing to do the work to put God as our first and prime affection?

It is up to each of us to decide.

~ Daniel Brockhan

Our First Affection: Part 1 of 2

Our First Affection

Who should be our first affection? Most reading this will likely say Jesus Christ, or at least the Triune God. Does our life truly reflect that fact? I think about how many distractions we have in our life: Work, Television, The Internet, Tablets, Cell Phones, Spouses, Girlfriends, Boyfriends, Fiances, Children, Family, even Friends. We have a great many things calling out, yelling for our time, screaming for our attention; yet God does not compete with us like the world does. God does not come at us raging but comes to us in a still small voice, ever present, ever near, ever with his arms wide open.

We are the ones who pass God. Maybe we decide simply not to go to church for no reason. Maybe we decide not to pick up our bibles to read. Perhaps we feel tired so we decide not to pray. Little by little such things take us from God and we are likely to spend our time pursuing other avenues. None of the things which distract us or that we might put before God are bad or evil or sinful in and of themselves, but it is when we fool ourselves, when we find ourselves placing such things in front of God, in front of Christ that these things become idols, become things that can actually keep us from God.

Here are some thoughts from Fancis De Sales on True Devotion:

There is only one true devotion, but there are many that are false and empty.... In his pictures Arelius painted all faces after the manner and appearance of the woman he loved and so too everyone paints devotion according to his own passions and fancies.... Many persons clothe themselves with certain outward actions connected with holy devotion, and the world believes that they are truly devout and spiritual whereas they are in fact nothing but copies and phantoms of devotion.

These are some strong images for those of us who do attend church, go to bible study, do our prayers; yet in the midst of life perhaps we are not as devoted to God as others may think, even as we may think. Perhaps this is because instead of comparing ourselves to Christ we compare ourselves to others who are less involved, less loving, less caring, less self-sacrificing, when instead we should be asking God ways to make us more involved, more caring, more self-sacrificing. Perhaps we are just to blinded by our own life and the world around us to hear God speaking to us in that Gentle Whisper as we run hurried to this place and from that place, never stopping to listen, to hear. We must put our affections and love towards Christ, for he is eternal while the world around us remains temporary.

I think this is where the thoughts or Richard Rolle will challenge us:

But this eternal and overflowing love does not come when I am relaxing, nor do I feel this spiritual ador when i am tired out after, say, traveling, nor is it [there] when i am absorbed with worldly interests or engrossed in never-ending arguments. At times like these I catch myself growing cold; cold until once again I put away all things external, and make a real effort to stand in my Savior's presence only then do I abide in this inner warmth.... Love for God and love for the world cannot exist in the same soul; the stronger drives out the weaker, and it soon appears who loves the world and who follows Christ. The strength of peoples love is shown in what they do.

And this brings us to two outcomes when it comes to our affections, either we have chosen to follow self, which will lead us away from God or we choose to make Christ our prime affection. Here is the key I think, with either choice God will desire to break us in some manner. For those who chose to walk away from God, perhaps follow some sin or idol, putting it in the place of God, I believe God will begin to break the person down by ridding them of their idols, by showing them these temporal objects will not last nor satisfy.

For the others, who seek to partner with God in making Him first, what are they to do? Everyone knows the typical answers such as seek God, go to church, pray, and read scripture. These are all good but I wonder if we are necessarily doing anything to show God our hearts true intent for Him to reign supreme. I think for us to truly begin to place God first we must sacrifice. There is a spiritual discipline for this to help us learn to sacrifice, one that many of us have forgotten or neglected called fasting...

May God stir our affections...  to be continued.

 

~ Daniel Brockhan

Christianity Unchained

I go to church. I read devotional books and blogs. So much of what I see is safe Christianity. We stay away from the tough subjects. We remain closed-off from the deeper truths that in each of our lives; the pain, loneliness, negative thoughts, and more that we each keep hidden behind the veil, the image we all portray to others that our life is perpetually happy, fine, and ok. The truth is most of us are far from ok.

I think God wants more openness and vulnerability. I think people are crying out for authenticity. Why do we always need to have order to our worship, our services, our programming, and our prayers? A little disorder and freedom might do us well. Certainly we can take freedom too far and some order is needed; but lately I keep asking myself: Where is the beauty? Where is the spontaneity and freedom of the Holy Spirit in our lives? Where is the life? Where is the rush of the love of God flowing out in amazing and crazy ways among us as Christians?

Why do we not have banners and art adorning the hallways, rooms, and sanctuaries of our churches from church members? Where are the writers, the poets, and the readers? Where are the song writers and their original songs being sung, performed, and played? Why do we buy and perform only music and bible studies that are pre-packaged and sold when plenty of us are creative and thought-provoking?

Why? That is the question. Is it because we are fearful of letting the Spirit go wild in us, giving God control? If we can know the songs, books, and studies are all approved by publishers or merchandisers at the local Christian bookstore, then we can remain safe perhaps, we can maintain control.

Maybe we do not need so much control. Maybe our need to control is what is keeping us chained down. And, because of these chains we are currently losing this generation who desire authenticity, openness, honesty, discussion, who need some order in their lives but also need to see the abundant freedom of the Spirit moving among us as well.

I remember years ago interviewing for a youth ministry positions and one of the questions I received often was about what bible study series from the Christian bookstore I use to teach youth. They always had surprised looks when I told them I wrote, and preferred to write, my own lessons.

I suppose somewhere in high school, I just no longer agreed with the culture of Christian merchandizing, whether it was the items for things like See You at The Pole or the newest book on the front shelf of the Christian bookstore. I began to find, for me, that Christianity was less about the stuff and more about the content, quality, and love. I began to find value in older Christian writers, as well as disciplines like solitude and simplicity that run counter to our American culture, which is fast-paced and anything but simple.

Hear me here. What we do not need is another t-shirt, wrist-band, or event; what we need is to seek and run after God with our whole heart daily, to allow Him to change us, for us to become unchained Christians ever-so-wonderfully lost in the midst of God's control and his loving hands as He guides and directs us. Then, as God changes us, we will show his love and tell of His greatness.

God does not need merchandizing nor events, for we as the church worshiping God and loving others in community, this is our advertising, these are our holy events. When we do such things as the church we are shinning as the light in the darkness of this world. This is how people will see, come, and know Christ. This is how they will become disciples of Jesus, by letting go and giving ourselves to God, wholeheartedly and unchained.

One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: ³⁶ “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” ³⁷ Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ - Matthew 22:37-39 

~ Daniel Brockhan

Letter to Men

See Also : Letter to Females

Our culture would have you believe men come in one of two categories, either they are the Ray Romano’s and Tim-the-Toolman Taylor’s who have a difficult time with logic or they are the strong and silent Ron Swanson's who like to eat meat, hunt, and would prefer to live alone in a cabin in the woods and never have to talk to another living soul ever again. These are lies. We are more than this.

Our culture would have you believe men are emotionless creatures, who follow pure logic or no logic at all, that they are creatures who pursue their visually stimulated lustful thoughts and have seemingly no control over their actions. We are either robot or beast.

This is also untrue.

Men have a depth. I have seen it, but it lies behind a veil that not to many women or other men will ever get to see. Men have been taught since they were young that their emotions are wrong, that they should not cry or be vulnerable. Still, even for those lucky enough to have good parents who encouraged open communication and allowed their sons to express these emotions, the world pushes them back as they enter school, college, the workforce, and pursue relationships.

I have seen men weep because they cannot find work to pay bills or provide for their family. I have seen men weep and question how they can be so selfish when they truly desire to love their wife more than themselves. I have seen men weep, gushing tears after a breakup, divorce, or death of a spouse, lacking sleep and not being able to eat for days or weeks. But from others, from the world, these emotions are hidden. Why?

There are expectations.

Men feel these expectations. Men do not have an out when it comes to life. People generally do not feel sorry for men. We are supposed to be independent and strong. When we leave to college we are expected to be self-sufficient and never need help. True, some do run back home and waste their lives pursuing their man-toys like video games or sports cars, but true men fight to live and are sometimes weighed down by these expectations. We are expected to have high paying jobs, expected to always have friends, and though not as verbal, we are expected to find someone and marry by a certain age.

But none of these pieces make a man.

A real man finds that there is strength in admitting his weakness, because this is the only way he can ever grow. A real man knows his emotions are there for a reason and allows himself to be honest and vulnerable but also sees the wisdom in only allowing himself to open up to those who are close and loyal.

Responsibility not Expectations drives real men.

Responsibility is taking hold of your dreams and pursuing them, knowing that no one else can live your life but you. Responsibility means you have to be the one who initiates friendships or a relationship, taking the risk of rejection or you are responsible for never even trying and putting yourself out there at all. It means working hard for your family or your future family, paying off debt, and sacrificing in the present for your future. Finally, men taking responsibility means single or married, you take up caring for those with whom you are close; friends, family, and others in need.

Men, I know you grow up thinking life is about becoming strong and independent but somewhere along the way I think we all learn being a real man is NOT about being an individual but about being a part of a community, a family, a person who cares deeply for others and wishes to be known.

Men only hold back because we are too fearful to move forward, we are protected and guarded, because while we were told to be strong, we still care what others think and how they perceive us. 

But at some point we will hopefully decide to start letting those expectations and worries about what others think go; instead learning that life, a good life, is letting others in, caring for them, encouraging them, and seeing them grow and succeed.

Men, never be afraid to be open and to be yourself. Don’t let our culture dictate what you should do, how you should act, or what you should share. Play and watch sports. Write Poetry. Sing Songs. Play Paintball. Go Hunting. Like Star Wars and Chick Flicks. Be You!

Know that being a man is more than pieces. Being strong and confident in yourself as a whole makes the man. Finally, remember Jesus was the man who threw over the tables of the money-changers taking advantage of the poor and wept and mourned the death of his friend Lazarus. If we are looking for an image of a man worth striving to be, we should start there, with the boldness and compassion of Jesus Christ.

~ Daniel Brockhan

What is Good?

What is Good? This question came to my mind Sunday after the sermon. The pastor spoke about the two extremes of legalism and liberalism, our tendency to be to restrictive based on the law of God or to be too free based on the grace we receive from God.

Why do we need rules or ethics or morals? Who chooses? I keep coming back to the question: What is good? Not what taste good or what feels good but what is good? I think this is how we get trapped in sin, how we become distracted by the world.

We confuse good feelings with good being.

In the end, my answer is this: God is Good. This is why we have the scriptures, Jesus, grace, and the Holy Spirit. God has revealed himself, his goodness and offered us guides in this life to help us find truth.

Just then a man came up to Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?” “Why do you ask me about what is good?” Jesus replied. “There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, keep the commandments.” - Matthew 19:16-17 (emphasis mine)

I think about the allegory of “The Cave” by Plato (1, 2, 3). In this story people live in darkness and only know of the shadows of real things. We, humanity, are like that. For the longest time I wanted to say that those of us who know the truth have climbed out of the cave. This is untrue.

 

The good news is that Jesus Christ came from the light of eternity, entered our darkness, limited himself, chaining himself down, living among us. He tried to teach those in the darkness the truth about their shadows and how they could have real and abundant life. For this they mocked and killed him; yet he was not held down or bound by the darkness of that place, of those people.

In Him was life, and the life was the Light of men. The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.... And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth. - John 1: 4-5, 14

Christ and his followers of The Way (Acts 9:2) have ever since been leading people from the darkness of this world into the light of the Kingdom of God. See, it was never us who climbed out of the cave of our own darkness when we were trapped; it was Jesus who pulled us out of that darkness, dimness, and our own weakness and into his good light, clarity, and strength.

Why then as Christians do we so easily desire to jump back into that darkness once again? What is it about our flesh, earthly desires, and that darkness that we find so tempting? Why do sin and evil so easily return to and entangle us? It is when we lack trust, when we desire temporal fulfillment over the long-term and eternal fulfillment that Jesus Christ has given us.

So, what do you chose today? Will you be stuck in that darkness, merely seeing and believing in shadows of life or do want light and abundance? Are you in the light but often find yourself tempted to run back into that darkness, back to that old self again?

What is good? God is Good. God sent his son so that we may have life. We were not meant to live lifeless life’s, meaningless life's, distracted life's, nor temporal ones. When we understand that, I think true, ongoing, and continual transformation is possible.

~ Daniel Brockhan

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Elizabeth O'Connor on Money, Giving, and Charity

From Letters to Scattered Pilgrims

Many have struggled with the minimum giving, and some have turned away. Others have broken lose and showered our community with riches.... Sometimes the giving has been excessive and ecstatic, and sometimes impulsive -  a diamond engagement ring dropped in the offering plate, a silver service set appearing at the door, a check for several thousand dollars representing the total accumulated wealth of a young couple.

It was not that our souls we so quickly converted, but that we sensed that something important was going on, and we wanted to be a part of it. We had been captured by a man's vision of what community might do if it really cared about the oppressed and the suffering.

In a recent sermon on money Gordon said as forcefully as ever that to give away money is to win a victory over the dark powers that oppress us.... He went on to say that the poor suffer because they are not able to give.

We still wrestle with fear when we consider abandoned giving. Our wills, with rare exceptions, look like the wills of those who have never been committed to the building of a faith community, or who have never had the poor in mind.... In any case, most of us would probably say that we are not as free as we would like to be where the material things of this life are concerned.

When we begin to take Scriptures seriously, "You cannot serve God and Money" (Matt. 6:24, NEB) becomes a personal address. One would expect God to applaud our small efforts at faithfulness; instead a Spirit comes and takes us where we are not yet prepared to go.

The First Commandment and all the Scriptures on the worship of idols begin to lay bare our own primitive selves. some of us have looked into the face of our idols and found that one of them is money.

Though we along with millions of other churchgoers are saying that Jesus saves, we ask ourselves if we are not in practice acting as though it were money that saves. We say that money gives power, money corrupts, money talks. Like the ancients with their molten calf we have endowed money with our own psychic energy, given it arms and legs, and have told ourselves that it can work for us. More than this we enshrine it in a secret place, give it a heart and a mind and the power to grant us peace and mercy.

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. ²⁰ But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. ²¹ For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. ²² “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. ²³ But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness! ²⁴ “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. - Matthew 6:19-24

From:

Elizabeth O'Connor. Dealing with Money. In Devotional Classics: Selected Reading for Individuals and Groups (Revised and Expanded). ed. Richard J. Foster and James Bryan Smith, 251-55. New York: HarperOne, 2005.

Works by Elizabeth O' Connor:

Letters to Scattered Pilgrims
Call to Commitment
Journey Inward, Journey Outward

~ Daniel Brockhan

Jeremy Taylor: Exercises for Holy Living

The Rule and Exercises of Holy Living

(01) Do not think better of yourself because of any outward circumstance that happens to you.

(02) Humility does not consist in criticizing yourself, or wearing ragged clothes, or walking around submissively wherever you go.

(03) When you hold this opinion of yourself, be content that others think the same of you. If you realize that you are not wise, do not be angry if someone else should agree.... You would be a hypocrite to think lowly of yourself, but then to expect others to think highly of you.

(04) Nurture a love to do good things in secret, concealed from the eyes of others, and therefore not highly esteemed because of them.

(05) Never be ashamed of your birth, of your parents, your occupation, or your present employment, or the lowly status of any of them.

(06) Never say anything, directly or indirectly, that will provoke praise or elicit compliments from others. Do not let your praise be the intended end of what you say.

(07) When you do receive praise for something you have done, take it indifferently and return it to God. reflect it back to God, the giver of the gift, the blesser of the action, the aid of the project.

(08) Make a good name for yourself by being a person of virtue and humility. It is a benefit for others who hear of you to hear good things about you.... Use it an instrument to help your neighbor, but do not use it for your own gain.

(09) Do not take pride in any praise given to you. Rejoice in God who gives gifts others can see in you, but let it be mixed with a holy respect, so that this good does not turn into evil.

(10) Do not ask others your faults with the intent or purpose being to have others tell you of your good qualities. Some will speak lowly of themselves in order to make others give an account of their goodness. They are merely fishing for compliments.

(11) When you are slighted by someone, or feel undervalued, do not harbor any secret anger, supposing that you actually deserved praise and that they over-looked your value, or that they neglected to praise you because of their own envy.

(12) Do not entertain any of the devil's whispers of pride.

(13) Take an active part in the praising of others, entertaining their good with delight.

(14) Be content when you see or hear that others are doing well in their jobs and with their income, even when you are not. In the same manner, be content when someone else's work is approved and yours is rejected.

(15) Never compare yourself with others unless it be to advance your impression of them and lower your impression of yourself. St. Paul encouraged us to think more highly of others than we do ourselves.

(16) Do not constantly try to excuse all of your mistakes. If you have made a mistake, or an oversight, or an indiscretion, confess it plainly, for virtue scorns a lie for its cover.

(17) Give God thanks for every weakness, fault, and imperfection you have. Accept it is a favor of God, an instrument to resist pride and nurse humility.

(18) Do not expose others' weaknesses in order to make them feel less able than you. Neither should you think on your superior skill with any delight, or use it to set yourself above another person.

(19) Remember that what is most important to God is that we submit ourselves and all that we have to him. This requires that we be willing to endure whatever his will brings us, to be content in whatever state we are in, and to be ready for every change.

From:

Taylor, Jeremy. The Grace of Humility. In Devotional Classics: Selected Reading for Individuals and Groups (Revised and Expanded). ed. Richard J. Foster and James Bryan Smith, 244-50. New York: HarperOne, 2005.

Works by Jeremy Taylor:

The Rule and Exercises of Holy Living

Holy Living

Holy Dying

The Great Example

The Worthy Communicant

~ Daniel Brockhan

Fear No More: Forsaking Fear-Based Living

In my previous blog entry I wrote about facing our darkness, how we must move into and through the darkness. Our darkness, whatever it may be, is not something we can just ignore; it must be something we work through and by doing this we grow.

Alongside this darkness is our fear. What do we fear? What do I fear? I remember when God called me to lead and minister at a young age, I was fearful, like Moses I said I couldn’t speak, like Jeremiah I said I was too young. The truth was that I was fearful, despite having giftedness in areas of leading, ministering, writing, singing, and playing guitar.

These fears are not gone, but they have softened over the years as I have used these abilities and received encouragement and confirmation over time. Even in the midst of my fears of not being interesting enough, cool enough, extroverted enough, or funny enough, I have found God telling me over and over to just be myself.

Just like we cannot ignore our darkness, we cannot ignore our fear.

Oftentimes our darkness and our fears are related but not always.

What are you fearful of today? What are things you know you should do, need to do, but have been to scared to do? Perhaps there are friendships or a relationship you need to begin or end. Perhaps you are at a job you despise but are fearful to find something else; perhaps you might then have to start from scratch.

Maybe you find yourself always saying yes to everyone and everything because you don’t have the confidence to say no, because you fear what it might mean. Maybe you have gifts and abilities but you are too afraid to share them with others, thinking others will only confirm the negative thoughts you hide inside.

Maybe you are fearful of being vulnerable, of sharing yourself with friends, with family, thinking if they knew the real you they might run or laugh or be in shock. Maybe you have been projecting an image to everyone, hiding your true self, because you do not want to disappoint others but hope to please them to the detriment of yourself.

Aren’t you tired of being afraid? Tired or cowering when God has made you a unique and wonderful person. This week, I want to start something new on my blog. I want responses. Ideally, I’d like to share these responses in a blog.

What do you fear? What are you fears?

Have you been ignoring them or pushing forward though?

How will you confront your fear(s) this week?

Please comment below or feel fee to send me an e-mail:

Let me know how you want to be identified or if you’d prefer to be anonymous.
daniel_brockhan@hotmail.com

Let’s stop being Afraid,
Let’s start Living Life Abundantly.

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. – John 10:10

#FearNoMore

~ Daniel Brockhan

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Fighting Against the Darkness

If we are honest with ourselves, we would all admit we struggle, we fight against the darkness. When we were young we didn’t understand it, comprehend it, or see it. Then, as we grew, as we got older, we began to know our darkness, we became aware of our sin, our desires, our inclinations that are not always inclined towards the good and turn towards the worse. Sometimes we do not mean to go into that darkness, but we are tempted by it, teased by it, surrounded by it.

Sometimes the darkness hovers over us like a cloud, encloses around us and sucks us dry, taking away our energy and our life. When the darkness comes some of us retreat, go into isolation, and hide ourselves from others. We don’t know how to express what we are feeling or why, don’t know how to understand or comprehend what is going on. For others of us the darkness is held at bay by distracting ourselves, by making sure we are busy with activities, schedules, and people; for if we are left alone it seems to come at us, not leaving us alone.

This darkness is real, every person, every Christian will face this darkness for as long as we stand in this world, because our struggles of the flesh, against Satan, against our desires will still cause us to struggle and stumble until the day when Christ comes and those chains are let loose. Until that time we all struggle, but the good news is this... We struggle because we are good, struggle because we care, struggle because we are growing and maturing. If we were not fighting against this darkness, we would only be giving in, giving up, letting ourselves be enslaved by the darkness. But Christ has something else for those of us who chose another path.

My dear brothers and sisters, do not ever feel like you have to deny this darkness. Understand this is a part of your life, of your journey, and the fight, the struggle is part of your story, part of what will make you grow up and mature. Every time you fight against the darkness and turn towards the light you are choosing goodness over evil, light over darkness, and Christ over the evil one.

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. - Ephesians 6:12

You may have thoughts or addictions you cannot get over. You may have anger in your heart, tell lies, or feel the need to gossip. Perhaps you are bitter or negative, life seems dull and gray. Know that this is not the end, this is just a part of your story. Indeed, this will not be the only time you deal with darkness but each time you overcome, each time you choose the light, you become stronger and the devil loses another foothold in your life.

This past week Robin Williams died. He fell into the darkness and took his own life. People are stunned by this, hurt by this, shocked by this. The reason it hits us so hard is because he brought us laughter and enjoyment. Darkness; however, does not discriminate, the reality is there. Previously Rick Warrens son also committed suicide. This is sad, people wonder why, they wonder if they can fight against such darkness in their own lives.

What I can tell you today my dear friend is that Christ made a way for us to leave this darkness, and that while at this time we will still struggle against it, one day the struggle will end, light will be unleashed, and his Kingdom will be made real and darkness wiped clean.

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. 4 ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” 5 He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” -Revelation 21:3-5a

I look forward to that day.

That is my hope.

That is why I fight.

Christ is what keeps my darkness at bay.

Close your eyes and listen to the song/video below.
Remember... there is a Light my friend!

Related: My Dark Night of the Soul

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~ Daniel Brockhan

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