Friends, Hugs, and Goodbyes

I don’t now why I feel compelled to write this, especially at 5:30 in the morning. Maybe it is because I get up so early for one of my jobs; maybe it is because other times you just feel compelled to write sometimes. Anyways, yesterday night I had dinner with some good friends, one of whom is leaving and it made me think about friendships, hugs, and goodbyes - so I felt like writing and making that my title, so here we go...

I ate with some friends last night at a place in town called Dos Amigos. The place was pretty good, though to me sometimes Mexican restaurants always seem the same pretty much. Sure the salsa, chips, and atmosphere might be a little different but it always feels like they are all the same. Well, we went out to eat to kinda hang out and say goodbye to a good friend who is leaving town. Later when this friend was dropping me and another friend off we both hugged goodbye.

This got me thinking... sure my friend will visit but things wont be the same, because friendships never really are once you leave... and you are ever-so lucky if a friendship survives after someone moves away. Sure we have all our different technologies - our Facebook, our texting (for some), and our cell phones; however, it is never the same as being with someone in-person, as a group or individually.

Sometimes it is little times like hugging a friend to say goodbye that remind me of all the other times I have had to say goodbye to others and how much I always miss those friendships, each of those people were unique to me. I mean, I had other guy friends as a child and remember them but when those friends moved off I just kinda felt bad but didn’t think about it all that much (maybe cause I am a guy or something). However, since college I hate saying goodbye, and its not like I get all emotional and start crying, not that there would be anything wrong with that (insert reference of Seinfeld, lol) - its just not really my style I suppose... but inside it always hurts to say goodbye and think of all the good times you had with those friends and how you will miss not being able to see them as much.

This also reminds me of my good guy friends from home: Jacob and Thomas, whom I still chat with on Facebook and on my cell from time to time, yet dearly miss that connection we all had as brothers in Christ and as best friends for a time. It makes me miss my best friends from college Grant, Willie, then Jonathon, Fili and Mark… Though I am very thankful for God blessing me with my very close friendship currently with Nathan and also with his wife Meredith (who are awesome people by the way).

I don’t know, sometimes being single and being in your mid-twenties makes me wish we didn’t have to leave friends, that God would somehow keep us together with our friends; but it seems most of the time we move again and must leave them behind, only left with the memories and occasional meetings once distance is put into the friend equation.

I wish I could live in a house with all my close friends, so that there wouldn’t be so much silence all the time, so many empty sounds. I miss hearing the laughter of other people in my house, of family... and I even think hearing the arguing is worth having that laughter in your life, worth having that close sense of connection. I miss that... and for those who have moved away from home, friends are the nearest and closest thing we have to family.

It might sound odd... but many people think of Heaven as a place of eternal joy, of no pain and suffering... but I also like to think of it as a place where friends don’t have to say goodbye, where distance is no longer a matter between friends, and where hugs are never connected with the down-feeling of saying goodbye but instead are only connected with see-ya-laters.

So this is my blog, these are my thoughts... maybe a little all random, maybe they make complete sense. Maybe these are encouraging or discouraging... I am not really sure myself; however, if there is one thing I have learned it is never to take your friends, to take that friendship for granted and to take hold of such a thing, to hold on to such people while you can before distance is added and time may soon leave them as a mere memory of the distant past.

~ Daniel

A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities.- William Arthur Ward

A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself-and especially to feel, or not feel. Whatever you happen to be feeling at any moment is fine with them. That's what real love amounts to - letting a person be what he really is.- Jim Morrison

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares. ~Henri Nouwen

Pic:
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